We're all human

I really believe that people read into things a little too much some times. I want to make one example and those of my readers can take out of it what they wish: If you know some one has a contagious illness, would you pick up their soda and take a swig? Nope. I haven't made any suggestions in any way to any one about anything more then I have shit going on this week. To those of my friends that just let me be, because they know how I am, thanks. To those who think they know, but don't, but try to get me anyway, stop trying and making assumptions. Let me be, if I need some thing I will letcha know.

I talked to NY again last night and I felt better. Some times when things happen in close friends lives I don't know what to say. The other night we spoke and I didn't know what to say, but covered it up well. Last night I said what I needed and adventures are in order for the first few weeks of June. Let my pants take flight. Going to Bonnaroo with nothing more then a car and a backpack, sounds like some thing I've been longing for. ADVENTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm trying to make it to the weekend. Between Aunt Ruth and TS Lisk. Good God. Some one needs to help us all.

Have you ever played? Me either and the title to this entry is the reason why. Not that I don't have skill, but not just the kind required to play marbles.

Matters on the mind this week. Aunt's having her second brain tumor removed on Friday. Quite frankly I am sick to my stomach over it, just as I was the first time. I can't imagine how she must feel. Some times I try too hard. I am there for her through it, along with my mother and her sisters and husbands and family alike. She is an angel, my Aunt, and every one who knows her knows that. We are in fear. Please remember her in prayer if you do pray.

Atop that I spoke with old loves over communication towers whose new loves have turned to old loves. Then turn to me and yet cannot give what I was waiting for so long to give. I let it go, or so I have told myself to believe so. Now I find much love in places so close to home that the distance alone, the past few years has led me to forget. I'm a mass of confusion because I don't know if I can help every one. I'd like to think that I can. He is a best friend in every way that a best friend should be. That is where time has led me and for this I am happy, happy.

My hands are cold, but my heart is warm. I've been so happy cruising through the woods and enjoying this coming of Spring. Every sense of it makes me breathe a little deeper, laugh a little slower. I enjoy it in it's entirety.

I found Counting Crows again last night inside a newer Radiohead. Took me back as it always does. They always did that to me in rooms where glow in the dark stars created a universe unlike I could see from a Space Shuttle. THERE I was.

Here I sit now and my stomach actually hurts with worry over what the next few weeks will bring to my door. I'll make best whatever I can. For the rest of those feeling like feeling despondent is all you can do, do it. Revelations will come and days will be like the coming of Spring again, in all its glory and rebirth.

Last note, I don't think that I can apologize for going off the crazy train today, it's good just to get it out there, whether it makes sense to you or not.

to feel more like myself. That ride we went on Sunday was approx. 15 miles. That's a long friggin' way through the woods. We only do that a few times a year. It tuckered me right out. I even napped yesterday. Today is a new day, I feel revitalized and already I have accomplished quite a bit. If I get to vacuum the Forrest out of my Jeep I will be done for the day.

Old bands are getting together tonight to play songs to see if sparks still fly from fingerboards and vocal cords. I hope it is fulfilling in lots of ways.

Things are coming up in months that are so close it's scary. We have concerts :) and surgeries :(
Camping :) and people moving to lands that seem so far away from home :(

I'm not ready for any more revelations right this day. I like where it all lays as it is in Amanda Jane land. As long as children smile and my eyes open every day, and 4 low holds on just till I get over this rock, all will be fine.

The worlds current events are a blur to me. I haven't paid much attention lately and with good reason. Concerned I am, but with the things that knock on my front door long after the family is at rest. Yet, my heart races with anticipation for what will happen from one moment to the next. I think I will go visit Mel and her mini her this evenings. I'm wearing sandal's and they smell like moldy potatoes. Be prepared.

Finally got in a full day of four wheeling through mountains that my eyes only see on the rarest occasions. Beauty aside from the headache left over from the night before where sitting on washers listening to old friends tell new stores was the place to be.

We did it all yesterday up kidder damn through hair pin curve over the tracks to historical landmarks that few know exist. It was just what I needed and if I could put into words what bonding is like in the middle of the mountains just trying to make sure that we can all get through, I probably still wouldn't. You'd have to be there and I'm grateful to the ones that lead me there and the others who followed with virgin eyes. I hope you all enjoyed the ride.

Only one bad thing, Shawn lost his cell phone. I'm going to find it later, it is on my list of miracles to perform today. Today, it's good to be me, and not to sound like an ass, but I lot of days it is good to be me.

there was a land filled with toilet paper, and Amanda Jane lived happily ever after. THE END

Like that? Silly I am I am, and some times I am wishing that I was Dr. Sues himself. Then again I'm not sure if the general public would appreciate me as a role model, but I do know a few people that would support me on that.

Let me see.........some thing intelligent. Sadly that last word will have to be spell checked so intelligent, I may not posses. Observations skills are pretty good. Last night I observed old friends playing old songs in new spirits. It was wonderful. Tonight is Mynde Flozz (formerly Re-experience), a talented band with endless tones and mixes of the most classic rock I have ever met. I will be on a strict regimen of soda and smoking. Alcohol is not an option tonight due to what I plan to have as an adventurous Sat. With small minds to mold.

Of course Sunday will be a Sunday to remember due to new friends on old trails. The weather should be perfect and I pray my driving will be too. My turn to drive up Kidder Dam and I wont throw the transmitting in park on the steepest part of the trail to let those less frightened dominate.

MY TURN, MY TURN. I am a big wussy. Looking forward to looking behind on these days knowing that they have all been the best of my life. So many people and so many stories to share. I am proud to say that the ones I've known since high school are still the ones I know today, on a daily basis. I think I am out of words for the week. Reflection is what I crave now, so off I go to think of all of you and all the smiles.

From Tuesday morning:
Last night S.S.I.
The horizon in my over grown eyes.
Driving home, the pig's lullabyes.
Sweetest dreams, I had not to fight.
The fire, the Drama, together, delight.

Good nights lead to good days which in turn end up as good nights. A lot of sleep and two cups of coffee thus far have me going, going, going. On our way, (me and Trevor) to purchase the new DMB album. Can't wait to take a ride at the sun down and listen to his new words and melodies. Actually I can wait cause we have a warm day planned full of what ever makes us smile.

Moved new utilities into homes of friends I cannot imagine my life without. There are nothing like those close friends. Those friends who call after their offspring gets nipped by a dog and your immediate reaction is to go to them cause you care as much as they do. Time flies, and that is no joke. I do apologize for my gallivanting this past month or so. The weather joins love and takes over the minutes to have me flying by the seat of my pants to see the beauty in what others may not appreciate. Though I know you all do.

I've finally found a place in my world, a medium per say that has me doing all that I want and still taking time to breathe. I will not burn out ever again. I guess I can't say ever, but I'm doing well balancing all of my doings and still taking time to sleep.

I can't wait anymore, gotta go to Gallery of Sound to buy my obsession. YEEE-HAAA!

Well, Dave R. sent those lyrics to me, it's a new Dave Matthews song and I can't wait to hear it. Thanks for sharing Dave.

It's a beautiful day, sun shine and warmth and friends and PT's. Sadly tonight is the last night for S.S.I. to play at Bone's bar. Which just gives me a reason to venture elsewhere for future Monday extravaganzas. The band is soooo good, but they don't start playing until after eleven most times. Who can hang out past midnight on a Monday? Not me, and not many of my friends. I know this would not be the last night for them at Bones if they played at ten. Oh well. I will venture out tonight for the last night but I know even at this early hour of the day that I will not make it past midnight. Sorry to see you guys leave but know your fans will go elsewhere to hear the music.

It's a big day for me today....I'm getting a hair cut. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Haven't had one in a long, long time, but it's so dead, the time has come.

Had a great time at Mel's party, good company and good games. Things I won't forget.
Jarrad free style trampoline wiffle ball home runs. Everybody Duck!!
Cranberry Vanilla Jello.
Cigar Shuttle Cock.
Mom and daughter on the trampoline (with the dog!).
Serenity beating Shawn with the bat.
and
Laying in the sunshine on a drug rug with love and tranquility.

Made a nice dinner for Mother's Day and then had a nice ride in the woods. My Jeep is steering like a champ, thanks be so Shawn and Danny. Unfortunately cramps took over and lead me an early bed time on such a sunny afternoon. Today is better but the leaky unit is in full effect for the next three or four days. Sorry to any one I was mean to but unless you bleed for a week, you won't understand.

Do I look at the world extremely differently than the rest?

I decided yesterday to change my settings to allow anyone to leave comments on my blog. The way I had it set up was that the only ones who could comment were people who had blogger accounts. Now, who ever when ever can leave their thoughts behind by simply clicking on "comments" below any entry. Now, I would appreciate it if you can keep it clean. Anything that I don't see fit will be deleted before eyes can read it.

Anyway I just changed it yesterday afternoon and I had two new comments upon looking today. Sadly, one of the comments is absolutely amazing, but it is anonymous, so I don't know who wrote it, if it's original or anything. Here it is:


"Hello Again,
Seems like forever between now and then,
You look the same,
I mean you look different but you haven't changed,
Funny to think how the time gets away,
Funny how you take me right back again;

Stolen away,
First time I saw you,
you did me that way,
What should I say,
I saw you laughing and I was afraid;

Never get in the way,
I did not think I'd see you again,
So how have you been,
Do you remember...hows everything,
Funny how I think how the time gets away,
Funny how you take me right back again;

Stolen Away,
First time I saw you,
you did me that way,
What should I say,
Saw you there dancing and I was afraid,
I might get in the way;

Never thought I would see you again,
How have you been,
Watching the years as they trickle away,
It's everything how our time gets away,
Funny how you take me right back again;

Steal me away,
It's like the first time I saw you,
you do me that way,
What should I say,
I see you there standing and I am afraid,
I might get in your way;
I never thought I would see you again,
How have you been,
Do you remember I mean everything;

You steal me away,
Like the first time I saw you,
you do me that way,
What can I say,
I saw you standing,
and I am afraid I might get in your way."


It's left me speechless, I just wish I knew who or what it was. If' it's a song, I'd love to hear the melody, So to who ever anonymous is, please don't be anonymous, be proud.

As for the rest of friends out there who always wanted to throw in their two cents, you can now feel free to do so. Happy commenting.

What a wonderful day. A few chores, then hide-n-seek. Then a ride for ice cream, a visit to Daddy, Greg, and Alan. A tour around town in the Power Wheel, 2005 Cherry Red TJ, after market KC lights on the Roll Bar. Two seater shift on the fly FWD and RV. Then up in the woods on foot to build small surprises for happy eyes. (and I got covered in ants, I can actually say without doubt that there are ants in pants.) Played retrieve with the three Retrievers. Had hot dogs, played with the shop vac. Danced to Bop ba ba. Now we chill. Trevor is getting silly and I thought we could get away with no nap, but by the look in his eyes I think we shouldn't disregard his silliness. I wonder where he gets it from?

Happy whatever today is, I think I need to do a little internet research on this holiday before I go out tonight and celebrate it.

For once in a long long time when I close my eyes now, I don't hear the battle inside my head but the silence that this mountain has to offer. Thanks be to God.

This weekend is going to be warm and sunny. I'm going to soak it up in the usual way, with extrordinary people. Ah, the silence.

Main Entry: 1love

Pronunciation: 'l&v
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English lufu; akin to Old High German luba love, Old English lEof dear, Latin lubEre, libEre to please1 a

(1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests b : an assurance of love 2 : warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion 3 a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration b (1) : a beloved person :

Posted by: amanda jane / 11:25 AM 2 comments

music, jeepin', camping, friends, ice cream, kids, family, PIZZA, warm beds, re-runs, silly people, puppies, flowers, tye-dye, new jeans, Spookie Daly Pride, sun shine, the color green, berber carpeting, moss, clean windows, a good poop, driving, dancing, blue eyed boys, clean hair, flatuation, new guitar strings, padded bras, pictures, mouth wash, sandlewood, nature, hiking, swimming, cigarettes (sadly), me, you, MTV, soft porn and plumbs. Hope you are smiling.

Hey, my Jeep is white under all those there scratches. Looks good, hasn't had a coat of wax in about a year, and my arms feel like they're going to fall off, but it makes me feel like I'm performing preventive measure for future rocker panel cancer and what not.

Wow that was one long sentence. It's chilly and sunny and cloudy and sunny and cloudy. I am on the brink of P.M.S. So be on the lookout for flying objects and the occasional uncalled for tear drops.

Myself, I am happy. Life is still good and my armpits, still sweat. I bought prescription strength deodorant and on the package it says "So good you could skip a day", well THAT'S SO NOT TRUE.

The interior of the Jeep smells like ass, but hey, it's a small price to pay for many nights of fun. The weekend was full of adventure, lots of four wheeling and Jeeps and a camping trip that at certain points I only wish I could forget. All in all good memories. I would go to great lengths to create days that company will never forget.

To see more good times caught in photos check out www.molned.com : and follow the web page to their photo gallery and of course you can get my view through digital images at www.picturethisplease.blogspot.com

Time to create projects.

1. What time is it? 2:16 p.m.
2. Name as it appears on birth certificate? Amanda Jane Packick (Goddess of her own land)
3. Nicknames: Amie, Amie Jane, Amanda Jane, Ass, Retard
4. Piercing: Ears
5. Eye color: Frickin' Green
6. Place of birth: Wooks-Barre PA
7. Favorite food: Pizza
8. Ever been to Africa? Nope
9. Ever been toilet papering? Sadly yes.
10. Love someone so much it made you cry? Indeed, twice yesterday in fact.
11. Been in a car ? Yes.
12. Croutons or bacon bits: Bacon Bits all the way
13. Favorite day of the week: Thursday
14. Favorite restaurant: The Dough Company
15. Favorite flower: Sunflowers (surpise, surprise)
16. Favorite sport to watch: Football
17. Favorite drinks: Beer, Water and Urine
18. Favorite ice cream: ANY
19. Disney or Warner Bros: How about my brother Danny? He rocks in his own way.
20. Favorite fast food restaurant: Wendy's
21. What color is your bedroom carpet? Blue
22. How many times did you fail your driver's test? Zip
23. Before this one, from whom did you get your last email? Heff
24. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Gander Mnt. or Riders World, or A&A
25. What do you do most often when you are bored? Listen to music, play music, talk to my dog Buddy, mastur....just kidding.
26. Bedtime: When my eyes finally quit and close.
27. Who will respond to this email the quickest? N/A
28. Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to respond? N/A
29. Favorite TV show: Roseanne (yeah, I'm different, so what!)
30. Last person you went out to dinner with? What is dinner, really, for me, it's the beer I crack open around seven or so.
31. Ford or Chevy? Fix Or Repair Daily, (I'm a sucker for metal)
32. What are you listening to right now? Three Golden Retrievers playing.
33. What is your favorite color? Green
34. Lake, ocean or river? River
35. How many tattoos do you have? Hang on, lemme see........still none.
36. Have you ever run out of gas? Countless times with other people, but never in my vehicle. (I have one of them there idiot lights, and trust it completely.)